I just returned from an incredible two weeks in Madrid and southern Spain. My friend Michelle and I began planning this trip almost a year ago. She took care of the sightseeing schedule, and I was in charge of logistics, including the routes we would take in the rental car.

We began and ended in Madrid and went south from there. After three days in Madrid, we picked up a rental car and began our tour. By the time we returned 12 days later, we had visited 10 other cities, most of them part of “the White Villages” of Spain.

The things we saw were phenomenal and tailored to our interests. Cathedrals, museums, historic sights, ruins from 11 B.C., monuments and a few scenic vistas were on our lists, plus a visit to a soccer stadium for me and an opera site or two for Michelle.

Here’s what I have learned about vacations, however. They are really only interesting to the ones who take them. While I can usually entertain the kids with updates if I keep them short and do them daily, I know that most people’s eyes glaze over after the first five minutes of a conversation that begins “How I spent my vacation…”

Still, without pulling out the 898 photos I took, here are some interesting tidbits from two weeks traveling through Spain:

* I really did take 898 photos, plus a few more on my phone. I know this because I began the trip with a new photo card in the camera and ended it on photo 898.

* We really don’t know “old” in the U.S. One local actually said, “I wouldn’t bother with that church. The original was burned and this one is new, built in the 17th century.”

The juxtaposition of old and new in Spanish towns is amazing. Centuries old cathedrals are often surrounded by new, modern buildings.

* No matter how often you repeat to yourself, “It’s kilometers, not miles,” you still take your foot off the gas when the speedometer says 120.

* No nationality beats Americans for kindness and helpfulness to strangers.

* If the answer to “Do you speak English?” is “un poco,” that means “No.”

* Dieting in Spain in easy, especially if you don’t like to eat supper after 9 p.m. and like breakfast eggs to be hot.

* If Allan Benton of Benton’s Smoky Mountain Country Hams would like to leave Madisonville and be king of Spain, all he needs to do is take his bacon to the people and show them how to fry it. They will crown him after first bite.

* Spanish people, especially in the smaller towns, don’t seem to worry about much and are very laid back, even the shop owners. Closing for a couple of hours in the afternoon for repast is real.

If you would like to see my 898-plus pictures, I promise they will amaze you. I should be finished editing them and figuring out which ones are Cordoba, which ones are Ronda and which ones are Cadiz by 2020.